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Rubbing One Out

January 4, 2010

As a kid, my preferred method of masturbation was rubbing up against something. I would grind against my stuffed toys, rolled up socks, pillows, what have you. I was rather young at the time and didn’t think anything of it, besides somehow “knowing” that this activity was to be done in private. I even remember crawling under the couch in my grandfather’s basement to rub one out. 

In elementary school, I continued to masturbate, but on top of keeping this activity on the lowdown, I also became more aware of the general feeling surrounding it, which was “it’s bad”. I started to hide the more commonly used toys. After all, it’s not like I threw teddy in the wash and quite frankly he kind of smelt like sex. Surely, a telltale sign of my masturbatory delight. 

Picture me a little older, I’m entering the teen years and by now I’m starting to understand sexual innuendoes on TV and in movies. I’ve even read a book or two that have described masturbation. I’m no longer subject to my OWN experience of masturbation, I’m silently comparing my experience to the ones I hear around me and I begin to wonder if the way I get off is normal. 

Every time I read or heard about masturbation, I was never told that you could get off by rubbing your genitals against something. It was my little secret and I thought I was acting outside the norm. I even convinced myself that when the time came for me to have partner sex, that my style of movement (circular) wouldn’t cut it during heterosexual sex, so I changed it to an in and out movement that mimicked penetration. 

When I was just a little older, some friends and I tentatively started to talk about masturbation among ourselves as something people actually did, as something WE actually did, but I never in a million years would have imagined actually telling anyone HOW I made myself cum. I can’t tell you the exact moment I was free of that barrier. Maybe it was the fact that I had some pretty open minded friends who spoke freely about themselves or maybe it was simply a matter of growing up and becoming more comfortable with the person I was, but as you can see talking about it no longer bothers me. I might not always be comfortable in any or in every given situation, but I’m not ashamed or embarrassed to talk about that discomfort. Isn’t that amazing?

8 Comments leave one →
  1. January 5, 2010 12:27 am

    I discovered masturbation much by accident when I was eleven. It was/ is considered shameful by many people. I don’t thnk I ever talked with anyone about it.
    My wife, on occasions when I wasn’t hitting it quite right, would push me away and take matters into her own hands. I found it an enormous turn on.
    Several years ago my step daughter took mom to an adult toys shop. She didn’t get one, But I get the feeling she was interested.
    Both step daughters use toys regularly, as does the daughter in law. We talked about getting her a toy for Christmas, but since her stroke, sexual stimulation causes her seizures, so no point in it.
    I work on rental property, and its funny how often we go in and there are toys laying about. We always give 24 hrs plus notice, and some times when the girl returns and we are still there, they try to hide it without anyone noticing. Others will display it prominently, and make sure we see.

  2. naturegirl1 permalink
    January 7, 2010 6:54 am

    I have to admit, I found masturbation very ineresting as a youngster! I remember the first time I watched a boy wank himself off until he ejaculated I was mesmerised! I soon found that boys liked it even more when I did the wanking for them!! I also enjoyed the feeling of power it gave me over them.
    It was only natural that I should start to explore masturbation with my own sex, my older sister had a best friend who secretly taught me all I needed to know about the subject.
    I have never felt any guilt about touching myself, something I find odd, even Philippe tells me that he would always feel a bit guilty after a quick wank when he was a teenager.

  3. January 7, 2010 6:13 pm

    Sounds like you had the right set of circumstances in your younger days, which resulted in a healthy sexual education. Not everyone has that experience. It fascinates me to hear how people grew to understand sex and their bodies.

  4. femsup permalink
    January 12, 2010 5:05 pm

    For someone who prides themselves on having an open mind to sex I just can’t find masturbating at work attractive.I have tried it I think 3 times and each time it was dreadful.I just don’t mix work with sex in any respect.

  5. femsup permalink
    January 12, 2010 5:09 pm

    So sorry that last comment should have been on the masturbating at work missive.

  6. femsup permalink
    January 12, 2010 5:15 pm

    There is a whole sexual prediliction whos followers are called “Plushies” who love to rub themselves against stuffed toys.I used to get a lovely frisson when as a child jumping onto a bed.I used to tell my parents quite innocently and earnestly that only occasionally would I be able to get that special feeling.It was a tingle in my penis and tummy that was delicious and I would only do it when I remembered which wasn’t often.

    I used to love to press myself against the cold wall of the bathroom for the sensation too.My whole body as well as my genitals.

    If only we could remain as open about what sensations our body experiences.

  7. January 12, 2010 6:05 pm

    I never heard of “plushies” before. Thanks for the info. I used to press myself against the cold shower wall as well.

  8. Kathleen permalink
    March 20, 2011 9:05 pm

    Used to hump pillows and blankets too.
    I really disliked stuffed toys. If I had thought to hump them, I probably would have liked them more 😉

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