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Female Ejaculation Part 8: Pee or Cum?

October 26, 2009

JULPU6When I first started squirting when having an orgasm, sometimes, I just wasn’t sure if it was pee or cum. I had been told by a friend of mine to just let go when I felt an urge to pee and that that signified I was about to cum as opposed to actually having to take a piss, but every once in a while, I still had a doubt: was this truly cum or was it in fact pee? 

I didn’t question the ability of women in general to squirt, but I wondered if that was what I was doing, which is what led to some strange habits. Mainly, smelling the huge wet spot on my bed to see if it was similar to pee in any way, but since it’s been a good twenty odd years since I’ve peed in my bed, I didn’t have much to compare it to. 

Then I figured I would make absolutely sure to empty my bladder before masturbating myself to bliss, but my all too logical brain told me that it was possible that enough time had elapsed between the time I peed and the time I came for my body to produce some more piss. 

On and on, I tortured myself with this question: was I peeing or cumming? I became convinced there was no way I could cum SO MUCH. One time, I swear, I must have gushed a liter. An event, shortly after which, I was on the phone with my (then) best friend who in her profound wisdom asked me: “Does it really matter?”

That’s when it dawned on me: I didn’t give a shit whether I was peeing or cumming! Wow, did that ever feel liberating. Let me explain, pee in-of-itself is a pretty basic liquid that is practically sterile, and the healthier you are and the more water you drink it becomes virtually colorless and odorless. So, let’s entertain the thought for a second, that once it a while you might end-up peeing all over yourself or your lover while cumming, I don’t think it’s such a big deal and if it was necessary step in my quest to achieve an orgasm, let me tell you I would piss all over you if need be. Yes, that’s right, ALL OVER you. 

Rest assured, that won’t be the case (unless you ask nicely), because your average lovely female cum IS NOT PEE. Let me say that again, FEMALE EJACULATE IS NOT PEE. It might have a similar consistency, and it might gush out of your body right next to the opening of your urethra, but it is absolutely, definitely not the same thing. 

If like me, you are a little paranoid that it might still be pee (even if it isn’t), there are a few steps you can take to make yourself more comfortable and since we all know that comfort is a key ingredient in achieving wonderful orgasms, you should take your fears into you hands and 1.empty your bladder before any sexual activity 2. invest some money in purchasing a sex blanket (that way you can avoid a messy clean-up) 3. work-out those PC muscles (strong PC muscles are the only way you can achieve a proper squirt and let’s not forget that they are a primary barrier against incontinence) 4. remember that the “I need to pee” feeling is caused by the pressure your engorged urethral sponge (G-Spot) is exercising against your bladder or on your urethra, which is what mimics the feeling of having a full bladder and 5. if none of that helps, remember that pee isn’t such a big deal in the first place. 

Next post in the female ejaculation series here.

Previous post in the female ejaculation series here

22 Comments leave one →
  1. jessica permalink
    October 26, 2009 2:56 pm

    great post…and it seems simple. but not caring is (in my opinion) a huge factor in any satisfying sexual experience.

    So, AMEN to pee.

  2. October 26, 2009 3:28 pm

    Oh ya, not caring is a HUGE factor in being able to experience pleasure and I mean not caring in that self-aware kind of way, by which I mean nothing will ruin a good time like worrying about the way you look or what your partner might think of you. It’s all about comfort and if you can’t be comfortable with your partner or yourself, there’s something amiss and you should really take the time to look more closely at whatever issues you may have.

  3. Lene permalink
    October 27, 2009 8:50 am

    Are every women able to have ejaculation or is it only a few of you?

  4. julia permalink
    October 27, 2009 5:07 pm

    I think that once you are settled & comfortable with a partner, you can afford to be a bit selfish & self centred about your own orgasm without having to feel guilty about it.
    As for not caring about what you may look like (flushed, drooling & probably making weird/intimate bodily noises!!), well let’s just say “who gives a fuck”!!

  5. julia permalink
    October 27, 2009 5:12 pm

    Theoretically, all women should be able to ejaculate, nature gave us all the same plumbing bits. But in practice, I believe it’s something like 7 in every 100 who are capable. But that is probably down to not wanting to “let go” & feeling embarassed at what is perceived as being incontinent.

  6. julia permalink
    October 27, 2009 5:22 pm

    But can I just add that I’m not into “watersports”. The thought of letting someone pee over me is far from a turn-on, as for the idea of peeing over someone else (even hubby!)….no no no. I couldn’t do it! I would feel inhibited!

  7. October 27, 2009 8:26 pm

    There’s definitely a learning curve of comfort that comes with each new partner. Hang-ups begone!

  8. October 27, 2009 8:28 pm

    Yes, Julia is right, every woman has the ABILITY to ejaculate, but not many (in my opinion) take the time to learn how to or they feel too inhibited, etc.

  9. October 27, 2009 8:29 pm

    Neither have I, but I can see the appeal.

  10. leslie permalink
    November 19, 2009 1:11 pm

    first off, i have to say that i agree; it doesn’t matter if it’s pee.

    second, it IS pee; there is no way all of that liquid could be contained in that little bulb.
    i’ve been with women who left white cream all over my fingers when orgasm happened,
    and that substance was ejaculate.

    i’ve been with women who gushed clear liquid that could be measured in cups upon orgasm,
    and that substance was pee.

    but you are absolutely right; it doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it’s about pleasure.

  11. November 19, 2009 1:37 pm

    But it’s NOT PEE, it comes out of a different orifice (the Skene’s gland duct) located under the opening of the urethra, which is where pee comes out of. The substance (female ejaculate) has been tested by medical professionals and is not composed of the same elements as pee.

  12. leslie permalink
    November 19, 2009 2:23 pm

    for cytheria and other performers of her ilk, it DOES come from the urethra.

  13. November 19, 2009 2:43 pm

    Do you have anything to back that up? I mean, it’s quite possible that some women would pee during a sexual performance to simulate female ejaculation, but that is not the same thing. Unless Cytherea has said herself that she fakes her orgasms and takes a piss to simulate female ejaculation, I’m gonna go with the premise that if it’s the real thing, it doesn’t come from her urethra, but the Skene’s Gland opening.

  14. leslie permalink
    November 19, 2009 4:12 pm

    from the hundreds of videos i’ve seen online, especially those that featre cytheria and
    tiana lynn, the stream is originating from the central urethra opening, not the skene’s gland
    openings that are on either side of the urethra. also, the skene’s gland, by it’s very size
    and dimensional capacity, could not possibly contain a pint, let alone a litre of liquid.

    some of the the so-called female ejaculation videos show a brief, heavy flood of liquid
    coming from the vagina as soon as the penis is removed. that seems staged to me;
    as if the vagina was filled with liquid before they cut (it’s always a cut) to the shot
    of the “ejaculate” coming out as soon as the penis is no longer blocking it’s exit.

    the women i’ve know who do ejaculate, did it in smaller volumes and it did not come
    out in forceful streams, as it does when one is urinating. also, the fluid was not clear,
    but a creamy translucent color.

    not trying to be adversarial; i’m just convinced that 90% of the porn videos proclaiming
    to feature female ejaculation are actually staged special effects, or simply urine.

    once again, it’s ok with me if it is pee; as long as my lover is cumming and enjoying herself.

  15. November 19, 2009 4:21 pm

    I have no facts to back my opinion on the matter, but I do lean towards the assumption that most “female ejaculation” pornographic performance are indeed staged like you have said. The creamy translucent “cum” that you refer to has coming out of the vaginal opening is basically lubrication and obviously some women’s vaginas lubricate more abundantly than others and usually when extremely aroused, but I wouldn’t define that substance as what is referred to as female ejaculate, because that substance is generally clear and can be quite abundant, and it is also composed of proteins and other biological chemicals that are quite similar to semen (minus the actual sperm). Basically it contains a lot of the same elements as prostatic fluid, which makes sense since the G-Spot (aka urethral sponge) is commonly referred to as the female prostate.

  16. simon permalink
    January 8, 2011 7:47 am

    just wanted to add my male perspective to this, despite the debate being from 2009!

    an ex-girlfriend of mine was an ejaculator (to put it rather crudely). we were together for three years and it was only after about a year that i first experienced her ejaculating. she said she knew all along she could do it but had never done it with anyone before. i had lots of experience of her ‘abilities’ in the following couple of years. she basically was encouraged by me, inasmuch as i was quite keen for things to move beyond the normal realm of sex. we had very fulfilling sex, usually once or twice a day, depending on how much time we were spending together. i remember one time asking her to pee on me, or just let go while i was on top fucking her. (we were in a hotel and feeling quite uninhibited, and this was always something id wanted to experience). the way she told it afterwards was that she didnt want to actually pee cos she knew it would be smelly but she could cum instead, and this is what i first experienced, albeit unwittingly. i remember us both laughing and looking at this big wet patch on the sheet afterwards and smelling it. she didnt actually say at that moment ‘thats not urine, its cum’ and i didnt really twig either, but i do remember thinking it wasnt very smelly.

    anyway, after this point i wanted her to do it again. i cant really recall how long it took, (couple of weeks or so) but as i soon as i figured it was ejaculate that was coming out of her i wanted to drink it. specifically, i wanted her to cum in my mouth while she was sat over me. i became very keen for her to do this nearly every time we had sex, and she was very happy to oblige. as i said, this lasted for another two years or so.

    heres some things i learned during that time:

    ejaculate (cum hereafter) is not pee. it tastes and looks entirely different. (trust me, iv drunk both liquids enough to know the difference. although id like to state that pee is pretty unpleasant and not sexually satisfying like cum is.) that being said, cum may sometimes have a trace of urine in it. i dont know why. i dont know much about the physical biology involved. i know that when it does, which was not very often in my case, it doesnt taste as nice. cum on its own tastes very nice, in the same way that licking a vagina tastes very nice. its not identical, but there is a similar muskiness that i personally really like.

    gf could ejaculate pretty much instantly. that is, she could lie on the bed, masturbate and be coming and ejaculating in under a minute. im not saying that to brag or anything, thats just how she was built. also, she wasnt a nymphomaniac either. she had no obsessions or weird hangups. she was just a normal girl.

    she could ejaculate repeatedly, although after a while the cum would sort of run out. not that we really tested its limits – i suppose it would have been weird for me to be shouting ‘more more’ like some pervy scientist. everything we found out was within the bounds of our quite happy normal practises.

    the cum was sort of cloudy. perhaps like really weak lemon squash. (didnt taste like it though!). at least once i asked her to do it into a glass so i could drink it that way. she produced half a pint quite easily. she said she could have done more but as it involved repeated orgasms it was a bit tiring. on that point, she did distinguish between the orgasms she had whilst ejaculating (which she could only bring on either by masturbating or by me licking her) and whilst fucking me. the latter she found harder to reach. her ejaculating orgasms she said were smaller and more centred on her clitoris, although after a few she would be fairly pooped and sort of collapse.

    although i remember looking, it was very tricky to see where it emerged. definitely not the actual vagina though. while vaginas obviously become moist before and during sex, that lubrication (which is pale and creamy where it collects) comes from inside the vagina. it would come out fairly forcefully. gushing would be the right word. however, it seemed to be that its flow could be altered in the same way that you can put your thumb over the end of a hose. she never did it in that comedy porn film manner, where it squirts into the air. but having had my experiences, i would say that certainly some women are going to be capable of that, and it need not be ‘faked’ with urine or anything else’. its going to come down to individual biology.

  17. simon permalink
    January 8, 2011 8:10 am

    oops, id not finished!

    anyway, she said the experience would feel (amongst other things) exactly like needing to pee, but when she let go during sex, cum would emerge. sometimes however, if she hadnt peed for a while, (and she did have quite a small bladder it seemed, often needing to go every couple of hours) during sex the cum would have a bit of urine in it. either or she’d jump up to visit the loo, then come back to bed.

    so, in short, cum is not pee. it looks, tastes and smells different. usually quite markedly so. urine is tangy and quite gross. cum just tastes like sex in liquid form. to my mind at least. also, it may come out as a dribble, a gush or a squirt, depending on the girl. its certainly distinct from normal lubrication, and it doesnt seem to be performing any such function.

    my current gf of two years doesnt (or hasnt yet been able to) ejaculate and i dont mind at all. we’ve been together a couple years. she knows id like it, and she watched squirty porn and finds it fascinating. she isnt grossed out. our sex is great and she is quite capable of clitoral and vaginal orgasms, as she distinguishes between them. she very rarely masturbates, and never when we’re having sex, but for whatever reason it doesnt happen. no other girl (there’ve been about 15) iv been with has ejaculated, at least not noticeably.

    thats all. thanks for listening.

  18. Kathleen permalink
    March 18, 2011 5:12 pm

    I know what you mean! I’m still not sure if that time I nerly squirted a pint was really me ejaculating or urinating all over myself. It’s puzzling.

  19. April 10, 2011 6:00 am

    Seeing as I have only recently been freed to a real process of orgasm through the practice of tantra, I would like to share my experiences thus far.
    Yes, there are two sorts of ejaculate. One is thin and gushing, and comes through G-Spot stimulation, and I also panicked in the beginning thinking it was pee!!
    I no longer care if it is or isn’t, the release of letting go, and the orgasm involved is worth the towels.
    Then, after a chakra tantric balancing exercise, I released a different liquid from a deep uterine orgasm, it had a different texture and smell to lubrication (and as lubrication I count both thin, clear slippery stuff and creamier lube that happens depending where in your cycle you are) and was thicker, and creamier than anything I had released before.
    I believe this is Amrita, released from the glands in the g-spot, aa it was different to the other ejaculate.
    All told, more fun, and aren’t woman lucky that they get to have different orgasms?
    Since my husband learned to orgasm without ejaculating through a basic tantra physical control mechanism (none of this “You can do it all with your breath stuff, there’s a technical tube you block!!!) he has had longer, better and multiple orgasms.
    The principles of Tantra and the release of letting go by both ejaculating and releasing emotional shit within my life has changed me forever.

  20. April 16, 2011 9:05 am

    This is a subject near and dear to my heart. I know you have all heard or read guys saying they love to eat pussy. Well I really do, not just pussy but nipples, ears eyes hell your whole body nothing left out it all tastes great. Some people are gifted with the ability to read others whether it is through body language, or exposure to them speaking about enough things to get a grasp on what makes them tick. It goes even deeper when you start talking about psychological issues and what makes people act in certain ways.
    Being a people watcher and understanding a small bit about human nature including having studied buddhism for several years more specificly the subject of ego and the two truths about reality has given me some insight into the emotional whys as well as the physical whys that make a good orgasm better. Then to top it all off I take great pleasure from making a women orgasm.
    I have always held the thought that the first time you are intimate with someone is the best time to set the tone for the relationship being something you are not and trying to change someone it something they are not is not the basis for a fufiling relationship no matter what the duration the relationship ends up being. What was all that about, well back to my point. Someone said earlier that they fiquired that omly 7% of women can ejaculate or squirt regardless of having the physical ability. My experience has been much higher. While I don’t want to talk about exact numbers I have had a almost perfect record once I came to understand this.
    Whether I am face first in your magnificent folds, have my fingers taping a cresendo on your g-spot or savoring the sensation of your cheeks pulled firmly against my loins after a session of orgasm denial or any combination of the above, there is nothing as satisfing as seeing the loss of situational awareness in your lovers eyes as she releases her entire being into her orgasm as well as several cups of liquid.

    @ Tantricblond What you refer to as “Amrita” has been known in eastern religions for centuries, at one time siddas would cut the muscle holding the tongue to the floor of their mouth to allow them to roll their tongues back into their throat causing “Amrita” to gather in there mouths. In sanskrit it is refered to as coming from curning “the ocean of milk” to release “the nectar of immortal life”. Very fitting indead.

    Cruel

  21. April 17, 2011 2:34 am

    @Cruel: I haven’t squirted in a while. I have no control over this particular phenomena. I can’t make it happen on command, but I always like it when it does. Feels like a great release. Makes me wonder what guys experience when they ejaculate.

  22. April 17, 2011 8:17 am

    Hi Olga, Fantastic Orgasms on demand theres an idea ! But that would take all the dirty fun out of it wouldn’t it. You might not have any conscious control over it, but you can take conscious steps to increase the possibility of squirting. Given what great importance we place on sex and satisfaction its surprising how little preparation we put into its success. I’m not talking about Victoria Secrets and candles here but mental preparations.

    I haven’t read a lot on Sexual Tantra as TantraBlond talks about it, but the path of buddhism I have been studying is Tantric Buddhism with mindfullness meditation as a key aspect of practice. I see the benefits of my meditation in everyday life both in my daily relationships with people and my ability to focus.

    Now imagine spending some quiet time sitting and thinking about nothing but the sensations of your body, becoming mentally familiar with your body, thinking about how your shirt or the cool room feels on your nipples. Focusing your thoughts on all the areas of your body that give you pleasure one by one becoming familiar with connecting your mind to that body part. With every though that arises about work, laundry or paying bills imagine it to be a mist that disperses when you touch it with your mind and return to your thoughts of your body.
    Imagine being talked slowly through this a light touch on your body to help focus. Combine this with exercises in trust and a D/s relationship with someone focused on your experiences during the session and the possibilities are endless.
    When I know I am going to be involved with someone I spend a little time reflecting on myself my body and my partner’s reactions in the past.

    I can not speak for all guys and what their orgasm feels like, but I know when I put a little effort and thought into mine the difference is well worth it. The volume of my ejaculate increases and so does the force of its expulsion. This in turn directly relates to the sensations of pleasure I feel and how long the sensations last. As an added bonus in some situations I have a pretty good range of distance. Its like anything else in this life the more you put into something the more you get out.

    I have some free space in my schedule if you need a private lesson :^)

    Cruel

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